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Showing posts from January, 2017

About Me

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Follower of Jesus Christ. Lover of people. Lover of animals. High Point University graduate. Appalachian State graduate. High school English teacher. AXΩ.

Pressed But Not Crushed

This was my Facebook status the other day after reading the tiniest bit of David Jeremiah's book What to Do When You Don't Know What to Do:
"I have quoted "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness" (2 Cor. 12:9) over and over but never, until this moment, realized that it literally means that you will NOT become spiritually mature until you have gone through a trial (or ten) of some sort. You have to be weak at some point in order to be spiritually strong, just as gold has to be refined by fire.
It's like how it's not really fun to go to the gym and it usually hurts, but if you want a result, you have to go through some pain!
THAT'S why we should be thankful for hard times. Even though they aren't fun, they will make us better - give us perfect strength. There's hope in knowing the hard time you are going through will produce something good eventually. #LightbulbMoment"

It's like I know all these thi…

The Darkest Days

I wrote this very vulnerable post three years ago today as a reflection on one of the darkest times in my life.
It took me four years to get the courage  and find the words to write it.
Please read and remember to cherish life and never put off something that the Lord has laid on your heart to do.

Friday, January 17, 2014  Two days ago, I overcame one of my biggest fears. I was driving to the bank, and I had to pass the cemetery to get to the bank. The cemetery I've been afraid to visit for four years now. The cemetery I had a nightmare about. The nightmare that haunted me for months. Caused by the silence, caused by relentless guilt, caused by my human nature and disconnect and self-absorption. I could see the headstones through the trees, now that it's winter - full-blown winter - and the leaves are gone. I didn't really plan on stopping, because I've always been terrified. And the guilt would just be too much, even if nothing happened to me. The sky was weird but reall…

Jesus and Wine Making

Seasons in the Vineyard 🍇
1) seasons of manifestation  We feel God's presence He is seeking us  He invades our world Ministers to your soul
2) seasons of hiddenness  We trust God's promises He invites us to go deeper with Him Ministers to your mind to build faith We seek Him 
Winter:  Vineyards become silent in dormancy - season of hiddenness A time of shaping  Energy has moved from leaves to unseen roots (you can't see the work God is doing right now, so it's frustrating because you don't feel like anything is happening) {Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future."} Tears / weeping bc the cutting and bleeding of the plant (the plant has to feel pain to be prepared to grow in the next season) Psalm 126:5 - "those who sow with tears will reap with joy" Don't despise the winter; for it is preparing you for spring- for wonderful growth
Spring:…

Let it Be Me

"God blessed the day I found you; 
I want to stay around you,
And so I beg you, 
Let it be me." 

On this day three years ago, I became Emery's mommy. I've found in life that often times, the best things are completely unexpected. I had no intentions of ever having a dog like her, and I had no idea how I would take care of her because I had nowhere for her to live, but when I held her and she looked at me with her big brown puppy eyes, I knew I had to, for the rest of her life. I tend to do that - decide I want something even though it seems irrational, but somehow the Lord works it all out. And that's just what He did.

So often, we look at the small picture and life's difficulties seem unmanageable. That's how it felt with Emery at first. I had nowhere for her to live, but I knew I couldn't bear to give her up. If I had been able to see the big picture and know that my parents would eventually keep her at their house and fall in love with her and take care…

Dating at 28 vs Dating at 21

I was just thinking the other day. I (over) think quite often. Sometimes it's good because it causes reflection, and this reflection was good.

I never really thought about the fact that I might be dating at 28 years old. I was never, EVER in a rush to get married, but there was a time when I assumed I'd be married by now. Looking back, it's interesting to see how things have changed from the time I was 21 until now, and why it's a really good thing I am still dating at 28.

All people are different. One of my best friends met her husband at 14. I have friends in their 30s that aren't married. Each person and situation are unique.

With that being said, I know that personally, I would not have been ready for marriage at 21. Or 22. Or even 25.

Dating at 21 for me was kind of like "What can you do for me? How can you make ME happy?" At 28 I've realized it should be "What can we do for God? What will make Him happy? And how can I make YOU happy?"
I had…