I think I realized this morning why I'm not permanently in Boone anymore. When I got to Boone on Friday night, my spirits immediately lifted. Last week was a really really hard week, and I just longed to be in boone the whole time, thinking that Boone would heal everything like it always has. Well, I was in a terrible mood Friday afternoon until I got to Boone that night. The minute my car hit Boone I immediately got in a wonderful mood and was so happy. I told Grace, "maybe this means I should be here all the time, if I'm so happy here..." And I was happy. I was so happy. We had a fabulous weekend. I'll write more about it later. But here's what I realized; this is what I think now while I'm driving home from Boone, reflecting on the weekend and the church service this morning:
Boone was a place for me to be, where I was safe and could grow, for a certain portion of my life. The year that I spent in Boone is likely the only time that I will actually live there, and as much as it hurts to not be there all the time anymore, I know that God has other plans for me. I've tried hard to have the opportunity to live there again and God keeps saying no! I believe that now, Boone is a place for me to go to recharge. To relax. And escape for when life gets to be a little too much, too overwhelming. A place where I can go to pray and find clarity. A place I can go to forget my current situation for a while. I don't think I would be happy living there all the time anymore because God has work for me to do in the valleys now. He needs me out of my comfort zone. I learned so much and grew so much in my time on the mountain, and now it is time to continue to take what I learned into the valleys, as I've been doing for the past year. The memories I have from living in Boone are invaluable and I will always cherish them. I will always go back as often as I can to recharge and relax, but now I am officially ready to go wherever God leads me. I want to take my mountaintop experience and share it with the world. I cannot keep it to myself.
When you are constantly growing, you cannot remain complacent. God won't even let you if you try.